Finding Joy Through Self-Love

Photo by Yasmin

This summer (and all of my life) has been filled with lessons. As of right now, the biggest lesson I've learned is the importance of loving myself. No matter what battle I've got going on inside myself, it always ends up with me realizing I've not been loving (nurturing, valuing, honoring, accepting) myself.

When I work on loving myself, I get to...

Fight my spiritual battles. I've been using More To Life processes to get clear about what's stopping me from being who I want to be and what I can do to move forward. There is one process that is particularly effective which involves forcefully disavowing core beliefs (I'm not good enough, I'm worthless, I'm a failure) and then avowing new ones (I am enough, I am creative, I am loveable).

Trust that I know enough. I don't need to compare myself with others or constantly tell myself I should be doing with other people (friends, books, and blogs) are doing. In loving myself I'm choosing to reduce the number of blogs and books I read, and instead make choices from my own intuition.

Ask for help. In loving myself I did this-- I asked my Mother-In-Law to watch my kids one morning a week so I could have space, and she said YES. I am so excited and relieved.

Forgive people and accept them as they are, without demands or expectations. In loving myself, I've been forgiving myself and in turn opening up to others.

Meet new people and create friendships. I've been realizing I've not been social for quite awhile. I've even lost several friends lately. In loving myself I'm making a choice to be courageous in approaching people I find interesting and introducing myself, and to find opportunities to be engaged in my community more.

Say no to what doesn't work for me. In loving myself I'm being more intentional about what works and doesn't work in my life. I declined on a blog project, I'm limiting books and blogs, I'm allowing myself not to push myself to clean and garden every day, and I'm reflecting and writing about what it is I truly WANT to do.

Do what works for me. Loving myself means I can pursue my interests and passions during the time I've freed up by trusting myself, asking for help, and letting go of what isn't working. This is the step I'm currently on in this process of learning to love myself. There is so much I want that I haven't let myself do, or conversely that I've been forcing myself to do (which makes me not enjoy it). It's a different experience to choose something just because I feel like it.

Enjoy life more, finding fulfillment and joy in life as it is.


I'm interested in knowing what it is for all of you to fight for yourself. What does it feel like for you when you are not loving yourself versus when you are? How do you get back to a place of self-love, and what benefits do you gain from being in that place?


Related posts:
Living a Simple, Balanced Life
My Most Important Things
Forgiveness and Love